Johnny Chuck Foglesong’s Blog
July 30th, 2007 by admin
Feel free to post stories about the Harv AE/Cat-Fur BBS and other funny stuff.
9 Responses to “Johnny Chuck Foglesong’s Blog”
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
Enjoy some of the funny stuff on here.
Feel free to post stories about the Harv AE/Cat-Fur BBS and other funny stuff.
You must be logged in to post a comment.
I used to back up in Harv’s lawn and do 5,000 RPM clutch dump’s and let that sucker rip. Think I didn’t? I’d come out of that place going sideways every weekend. That had to hire Wackenhut to patrol the neighborhood thanks to me.
You used to do those clutch dump’s, too? I thought I was the only one who did that. I used to hate ruining my tires on asphalt, so I would save it for the lawn. It’s so much less stress on the drive train during a rain storm when you’re sitting there at 5,500 RPM’s in 2nd and 3rd gear while at a stand still.
The trick is waiting for the rain. I try to do lawn jobs during the worst of all rain storms so that when the rain is hitting the person’s roof, it’s nice and loud in their house so they can’t hear my engine winding out in their front lawn. I usually turn off my head lights. Try to buy cars without having day-time running lights so that nobody sees you as you’re coming out of the lawn sideways at 6,000 RPM in 3rd gear. That’s the best way to do it. Always use high octane gas so that there is no pinging.
One other note that a friend of told me about… one time he got stuck in somebody’s lawn while doing this. When the other came out, he said that somebody ran him off the road and the GUY BELIEVED IT! Unreal!!!
I think that somebody should take Bob’s Barricades and put them in the street in front of Harv’s house making it so that all people passing through will be forced to drive through his lawn while passing. For some people, this would be an excuse to floor it during a rain storm and if somebody stops them, they could say, “I was scared of getting stuck, so I floored it.”
Actually we DID route traffic though the Harv’s yard (after kicking over the Bee’s off of Old Cutler Road) and it made a mess!! That yard looked like a house full of porch monkey’s forgot to do any yard work for the better part of two years!!
In fact, the yard looked so bad, it looked like a group of jigs misappropriated their welfare checks and went to the crack mans house and opted not to EVER get any help with the gaggle-fuck had become their yard! That’s the biggah though! He doesn’t like to spend any money that’s not REQUIRED for survival! This is why he always had a healthy supply of Vodka. Like I said - life and death ONLY!!
Ya know, the more time I spent trying to rack my brain as to how many times I’ve been responsible for SIGNIFICANT clutch dumps combined with using specialty octane fuel, I’ve usually been rated at 107 octane, (give or take), taking me into constant dough nuts and sideways shenanigans and I guess, ALL AROUND NIGHTMARES, If you happen to have the last name HARVEY - This name *again* has been bastardized by *ALL OF THOSE TERRIBLE* lawn-hooligans who call us all “Mr & Mrs Harv A.E.” Not Harvey, but Harv A.E.
Strangely enough, that name is often hyphenated by ANOTHER strange comment, after that text which you will see all over at sites like this, so aptly put at “Mr & Mrs Harv A.E. - Catfur!”
No one in this family, or relatives, have any clue as to what this can mean!!! In fact, The Harv Family were all dog lovers - not CAT! They could give a rats ass about this god forsaken cat-fur!!!! WHY IS THAT MENTIONS LINDA, AS SHE NURSES HER 72nd Bombay Saffire Cocktail!!!!
[[MORE TO PASTE]]
After the text which you will see all over at sites like this, so aptly put, “Mr & Mrs Harv A.E. - Catfur!” - FOLKS, THIS IS A VERY SIMPLE QUESTION TO ANSWER … You see, Boobage is correct in his assumption that “e” or “y” or better yet, “AE” finishes off the infamous Harv
name-sake! NOW, consider that only a select FEW of us truly understand that the “AE” really means “Ascii Express.” Nonetheless, we ALL still owe it to the once living Bigga, the soon to be pushing dasieys, Louis, the hedious Linda, and of course JAAAAAAAAAN, to keep the memory alive by never ending a sentence with the Harv’s good name WITHOUT EVER FORGETTING “A.E., Catfur.” - Now, if you really want to not be an ass-licker, you might as well through in the baud rate, just for shits & grins … For example:
“Tonight the neighborhood watch had to call the patrol on Linda, ONCE AGAIN, because the whole area was soaked in bloody tampons that spelled out “WELCOME BACK JAAAAAAAN … YOU GUESSED IT, THE HARV A.E. CATFUR, IS STILL RUNNING AT 10 MEGS AND 110/300 BAUD!!! She never did specify what version of DOS it was?!?!!? I’m guessing 6.2 THINK IT AINT???
Dude, I am wondering WHERE THE HELL IS THE BIGGAH IS BURRIED!! I would like to go see him this holiday season. How do I do it??
To anyone who can help me: PLEASE!!!
Perhaps some of you may have remembered me by my post a week ago about my large
African American girlfriend who weighed 300 pounds. Well, since my last post she has gained 72 pound again and her diet failed like a nigger at Harvard.
See, she drinks Keopectate, and when I’m down under the covers eating her contaminated orangutan buttercup, she INSISTS
on blowing corned wind beef tornado’s that nearly lift the bed off the ground
but prevent me from escaping because the covers are tucked in too tight.
Now, I am from Pakistan, and she was angry at me because I am not too familiar
with the American language. Her mom called one night when I was stuck under the covers and she passed me the phone and it a desperate attempt to get out of the bed, I told her mother that her daughter was one heck of a porch swinging, knuckle dragging, yard-ape that smelled like a soggy refuse plant that had been on fire.
I THOUGHT THAT WAS A COMPLIMENT.
Since I am not from this country, is it wrong to call a person who is African America a spear chucking porch ape. All the neighbors in our trailer park get drunk and post those signs in our yard and I though they were being friendly.
One nice Gentleman called her a “feces slinging patio-anthropoid that stinks like a rotten aardvark” Now in my country, that is a compliment because we all do not worry about the stupid things you American’s worry
about like smell.
Anyway, once I told her mom she drags her knuckles on the ground and swings from tree to tree looking for bananas, she made me stick her nose up her gigantic red-eye butt Cyclops and blew a chuck of sludge on me the size
of a pancake. My face was dripping with her wet, gorilla beef detonation and I ACTUALLY ENJOYED IT.
Is this normal in a marriage?
Also, can someone please advise me if it’s okay to refer to her mom as a back-door, hairy ape that swings from the trees and stinks like 45 feet of wet soggy refuse that caught fire from an old sewer processing plant?
IS THAT NOT A COMPLIMENT?
Please email me and help me understand this strange American Culture!
I tried going to bargainbasementbrainsurgery.com and they had the balls to tell me NO for medical clearance UNLESS they did the surgery themselves! You see what I get for paying $25 cash to one of their brain surgeons. I should have been suspicious when the anastesia was nothing more than a Gin & Tonic, loud yelling, and then a small sledge hammer!! Now, I have to get my original neurosurgeon to give me the ok.